BANGING Sangria ! MMMMM!!
My cousin and I hanging out at Dolce
A friend, Kiran, visiting from London
Sneaker CAKE courtesy Cakes Galore by Sheila.
This was a friend's birthday cake but I just HAD to post here because Sheila's just so talented!
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Friday, April 8, 2011
MY sk8er boy!
My son went ice skating for the first time. He was a little skeptical (as was I) but I always tell him to try new things as long as he's not going to endanger himself...and turns out he enjoyed it! He said "a little girl half my height" (lol) made circles around him, and without saying a word, brought him a "walker" to help him out.
I thought that was really sweet of her...and a reminder that there's still hope for the world after all !
Friday, April 1, 2011
Songwriter's Circle at The Red Lion, NYC
The last Monday of every month there's a Songwriter's Circle at The Red Lion in NYC, hosted for the SGA (Songwriter's Guild of America) by music guru Ann Ruckert.
This past Monday was filled with pleasant surprises and reasons to celebrate.
Jake Holmes was in the building and showed us a new interesting & musical way to use an Ipad! Yes, now I want an Ipad!!! He is so funny and uber-talented...and I LOVE the song he dedicated to Japan.
We also had a visitor from Nigeria: Ola Fagbola!
Ola now lives in Trinidad and is a physician by day, musician at night. He was checking out the NY music scene while on vacation!
There were so many talented people in the room. Brian Muni, Bruce Gordon and Ellen Kempner (who is only 16 years old and a MAAAAAAJOR talent! She also recently got her driver's license so the roads are definitely not safe!! lol)
...and sang "Love Me" (written by yours truly) to a very gracious (a.k.a. intoxicated) crowd, which certainly helps for great applause! ;)
This past Monday was filled with pleasant surprises and reasons to celebrate.
Skip Brevis (on right) with the rest of the gang
Galia Arad (who unleashed her hidden talent as fist-pumper/booty shaker) and Kirsten Thien (hand-clapper extraordinaire) were both on hand to congratulate Markeisha Ensley, fellow recipient of the Songwriter's Hall of Fame Abe Olman Award!
Galia Arad (Abe Olman recipient)
Kirsten Thien (also past winner of the Abe Olman prize)
2011 Abe Olman Recipient, Markeisha Ensley
Congrats Markeisha!
Jake Holmes was in the building and showed us a new interesting & musical way to use an Ipad! Yes, now I want an Ipad!!! He is so funny and uber-talented...and I LOVE the song he dedicated to Japan.
Jake Holmes
There were so many talented people in the room. Brian Muni, Bruce Gordon and Ellen Kempner (who is only 16 years old and a MAAAAAAJOR talent! She also recently got her driver's license so the roads are definitely not safe!! lol)
Brian Muni
Bruce Gordon
Ellen Kempner
I was invited onstage as well...
Mandy Bennett :)
...and sang "Love Me" (written by yours truly) to a very gracious (a.k.a. intoxicated) crowd, which certainly helps for great applause! ;)
Monday, March 28, 2011
When a good boy goes....awry ! (also, inside Chris Brown's album release party)
In 2007 Rihanna released her third album "Good Girl Gone Bad"; now her ex, Chris "Breezy" Brown seems to be following in her footsteps...but not quite skyrocketing into fame like the red-headed beauty...instead he seems to be spiralling outta control right before our very eyes! The young, talented cutie who once graced the stage and won all our hearts is apparently aiming for "Good Boy Gone BADDDD!"
So what is happening to Chris Brown? I am so saddened by this because he is one of those people who has been blessed in every sense of the word! He has the looks, he is gifted, he has run the gamut in the entertainment industry and showed soooooo much promise for a very lucrative career. Yet, it seems he has
Chris - on left- after one of his killer performances a few years ago
...and on right - after his "Good Morning America" incident recently
He is young, handsome and undeniably ridiculously talented (he sings, dances, writes, he's an artist --Chris did most of the artwork on his latest album F.A.M.E. -- and so much more) ...
no guidance as to what to do with it all.
Where are the people in his camp? Is there noone around him to help him pull it together?
I am hoping that this is just a phase. He is young and I hope he gets just enough madness out of his system to not harm himself or completely ruin his career.
I am rooting for you Chris!
Here's a view inside his recent album release party at Webster Hall NYC, courtesy my cousin, J'Nell.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Inside Marsha Ambrosius Listening Party
Here's a sneak peek inside Marsha Ambrosius Listening Party for her debut solo album "Late Nights and Early Mornings", courtesy my cousin, J'Nell, (who was the videographer) and of course the fab TV and Radio personality, Egypt.
All beautiful ladies doing big things! Enjoy!!
All beautiful ladies doing big things! Enjoy!!
Tuesday, March 15, 2011
Thankful for our Blessings!
This past weekend was a celebratory one. Firstly, my son's basketball team won the Championships for their division (YAAAAAAY!!!!) and secondly, we celebrated my son's birthday!
He forfeited a birthday party in light of the tournament. The date and time was sketchy (since the CYO kept changing it) and so planning a party would've been risky. Well some of the parents got wind of it and decided that was so "noble" of him that they were going to celebrate it anyway!
It was very touching to me.
My son's birthday cake
(the shirt is vanilla cake with hazelnut filling and the basketball is chocolate cake)
courtesy Cakes Galore by Sheila
Across the world we all heard about and watched the devastation in Japan and surroundings areas...it is absolutely heartbreaking!
So despite whatever's happening in my life that may not be the way I want it to be at that moment, I continue to be grateful for all my blessings. I am okay, my son's okay, my friends and family are well and safe...we have MUCH to be thankful for.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
Nets/ Clippers game
Went to the Nets/Clippers game on Friday. It was a REALLY good game. I was rooting for the Clippers since my son is a Blake Griffin fan, but both teams played really well, especially Jordan Farmer and Kim Kardashian's boo, Kris Humphries.
The Nets were down by about 10 in the first half and I was almost sure the Clippers were going to win...but the Nets made a come-back and in the last quarter tied 94-94. They went into overtime and the finally the Nets won 102 - 98.
The Nets were down by about 10 in the first half and I was almost sure the Clippers were going to win...but the Nets made a come-back and in the last quarter tied 94-94. They went into overtime and the finally the Nets won 102 - 98.
Blake Griffin
Kris Humphries
And the highlight of the game for me was when the dinosaur got into a fight with someone in the crowd! I don't know what happened but all I saw was a big fluorescent green dino diving into the crowd! hahahaha Like really? You're wearing this big girly dino outfit? WHAT could the guy have possibly done to piss off the dino? Pull his tail? (literally?) It was tooo funny! Security had to physically remove the dinosaur! Hilarious!
Dino being hurled away ! ^^^ lol
After the show there was a performance by Hezekiah Walker and his choir! I think it was rehearsal for his concert this weekend right there in Prudential.
Hezekiah Walker
It was a long but fun night!
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
This Little Light
A friend of mine runs this non-profit organization and I think it's for such a good cause that I wanted to share with you. I hope you will support as well...
"This Little Light, Inc. (“TLL”) is a non-profit organization formed in April 2008, to serve the under-privileged, homeless and sheltered women and children of New Jersey. This Little Light is heavily supported by Oasis Christian Centre and their congregation, along with donations and sponsorships from various groups, organizations, small businesses and individuals.
In December 2008, TLL hosted their first “Annual Christmas Party”. Homeless, sheltered and foster children from New Jersey and New York were treated to a holiday celebration complete with “wish list” gifts and a visit from Santa Claus.
In May, 2009 TLL, hosted a “Pamper Me Day” for the women in the shelters. The women were treated to complete makeovers. Our volunteers were hair stylists, manicurists and make-up artists, each one blessing the women with their talents. Afterwards, lunch was served and gifts were presented to all the women. Child care was provided on premises so the mom’s had a worry free Pampering Day.
Recently added to our annual calendar is our Summer Picnic. With plenty of food and activities, including games, arts & crafts and the Fun Bus, the picnic has quickly become a favorite with our clients and their families.
The tireless work of our staff, volunteers and supporters help to make each event a success. Because of these hard working individuals, we are able to continue to offer these three events annually, while continuing to respond to the many needs throughout the year.
TLL also volunteers once a month at a nursing home where we enjoy the company of their seniors.
In April, 2010 TLL was given a Certificate of Appreciation from the YWCA Eastern Union County for the work we do with them. We were also given a Citation from the State of New Jersey General Assembly.
TLL is able to continue its work due to donations from corporations, small businesses and individuals as well as individual fundraising. We are grateful to those who have supported TLL and we are always looking to partner with new organizations, corporations and individuals that wish to support our efforts.
Our goal is to be a resource to the community, to be able to help, support and provide where needed. It is our desire to be able to make a child feel good inside and grow up knowing that they matter to others. Our future goal is to be able to provide college scholarships. Our goal is to help women, who are leaving domestic situations to become financially sound through education and to build confidence and self-esteem.
If you would like more information, or would like to partner with This Little Light, please contact Kim Berry at P.O. Box 7302, Roselle, NJ or e-mail kberry@thislittlelightinc.org. Thank you for taking the time to learn about This Little Light, Inc.
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in Heaven.” Matthew 5:16"
"This Little Light, Inc. (“TLL”) is a non-profit organization formed in April 2008, to serve the under-privileged, homeless and sheltered women and children of New Jersey. This Little Light is heavily supported by Oasis Christian Centre and their congregation, along with donations and sponsorships from various groups, organizations, small businesses and individuals.
In December 2008, TLL hosted their first “Annual Christmas Party”. Homeless, sheltered and foster children from New Jersey and New York were treated to a holiday celebration complete with “wish list” gifts and a visit from Santa Claus.
In May, 2009 TLL, hosted a “Pamper Me Day” for the women in the shelters. The women were treated to complete makeovers. Our volunteers were hair stylists, manicurists and make-up artists, each one blessing the women with their talents. Afterwards, lunch was served and gifts were presented to all the women. Child care was provided on premises so the mom’s had a worry free Pampering Day.
Recently added to our annual calendar is our Summer Picnic. With plenty of food and activities, including games, arts & crafts and the Fun Bus, the picnic has quickly become a favorite with our clients and their families.
The tireless work of our staff, volunteers and supporters help to make each event a success. Because of these hard working individuals, we are able to continue to offer these three events annually, while continuing to respond to the many needs throughout the year.
TLL also volunteers once a month at a nursing home where we enjoy the company of their seniors.
In April, 2010 TLL was given a Certificate of Appreciation from the YWCA Eastern Union County for the work we do with them. We were also given a Citation from the State of New Jersey General Assembly.
TLL is able to continue its work due to donations from corporations, small businesses and individuals as well as individual fundraising. We are grateful to those who have supported TLL and we are always looking to partner with new organizations, corporations and individuals that wish to support our efforts.
Our goal is to be a resource to the community, to be able to help, support and provide where needed. It is our desire to be able to make a child feel good inside and grow up knowing that they matter to others. Our future goal is to be able to provide college scholarships. Our goal is to help women, who are leaving domestic situations to become financially sound through education and to build confidence and self-esteem.
If you would like more information, or would like to partner with This Little Light, please contact Kim Berry at P.O. Box 7302, Roselle, NJ or e-mail kberry@thislittlelightinc.org. Thank you for taking the time to learn about This Little Light, Inc.
“Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works and glorify your Father in Heaven.” Matthew 5:16"
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Late Nights and Early Mornings
Besides becoming the story of my life, it's also the title of Marsha Ambrosius' new album.
I fell in love with her voice and style when I heard her sing "Four Women" (click here to see her awesome performance with the phenomenal Jill Scott, Ledisi and Kelly Price).
This album is growing on me...it didn't quite grab me right away, except for "Far Away" which I LOVE and "Butterflies" which I recently found out she penned for the greatest entertainer of all time - Michael Jackson! But having listened to it a few times, I like "Lose Myself", "I Want You To Stay" and I LOVE the music in "Sour Times"...such a sexy song!
This album is growing on me...it didn't quite grab me right away, except for "Far Away" which I LOVE and "Butterflies" which I recently found out she penned for the greatest entertainer of all time - Michael Jackson! But having listened to it a few times, I like "Lose Myself", "I Want You To Stay" and I LOVE the music in "Sour Times"...such a sexy song!
Speaking of sexy, my cousins and I discovered this statue at a cute little French restaurant in NY this past weekend. At first we thought it was quite the conversation piece, and later found out that the sculpture was actually designed after 2 women...the top half of the body is one lady and the bottom half is another...ah, the French ...c'est la vie!
"When we narrow our focus, the problem seems everything" ~ Mark Nepo
I had a beautiful weekend which turned into chaos at the beginning of the week. Sometimes you wonder how one moment could transition into another so well, yet the very next moment could morph into a headache! LIFE !
I had to walk away, pray and re-group. This morning life is better again...not perfect...but better.
It's all about perspective. When you focus on the problem, it sucks all your energy, your joy, your very being! When you focus on the solution(s), YOU take control, YOU make the choice to be happy.
You decide!
It is not always easy, but possible.
"Very often, we continue, out of habit or fear,
to behave in old ways
even though we know that the way of things has changed.
Time and again, I have found myself at this crucial juncture: having to admit that what was essential
is no longer essential
and then needing to summon the courage to make the act of living essential again."
~ Mark Nepo
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Something as simple as this...
I don't even think I bought them, if I remember correctly my best friend had given them to me. I LOVE chandelier earrings, and she knows my style and taste. Anyway I've used them for YEARS! If you think YBF ripped on Meagan Good for repeatedly wearing her "door-knocker" earrings, then they REALLY would've had a field day with me! lol
Meagan Good (on right of course) and her infamous earrings
Pic from stylebistro
But I LOVED my earrings! I was madly in love at the time (literally!..the stories I could tell hahaha) and I remember the excitement of dressing up and going out with him...and those earrings. I remember all the dinners, parties, outfits, moments that we shared...I remember the heartbreak when we were fading...and still wearing and loving those earrings.
One New Year's Day, I was all dolled up and looked absolutely gorgeous, (you know when you look and feel stunning?) and he glazed right over me. It was as though I wasn't even there. I cried so much that night...the kinda cry when you actually feel your heart break? I looked like Courtney Love, minus the guitar!
Courtney Love...and I think this is one of her good days
I looked waaay worse than this.
I remember looking in the mirror at my tear-stained, makeup-all-over-the-place face, and taking off those earrings.
So I'm a little sad to throw them out, but I smile to myself at how far I've come. At the time I thought I'd literally die from a broken heart, and here I am stronger than before. It's a much different time in my life. I'm happy again, but my joy comes from within now. Everything else is a bonus! I love passionately because it's who I am, but this time not at the expense of my self-worth.
"I was destined to repeat the pain of rejection,
no matter how skillfully I handled it,
until I opened the door of self-worth"
~ Mark Nepo
Monday, February 28, 2011
The Oscars, Mardi Gras and Carnival
I missed the Oscars telecast because I went to a Mardi Gras dinner. My fave part of the Oscars is always the red carpet so I had to catch up today! Here are a few of the looks I liked...
Meanwhile on the East Coast, I was inhaling jambalaya, cajun shrimp, sauteed tofu, bourbon chicken and pasta salad at a Mardi Gras dinner. Nothing like food, fam, friends and laughter!
This was dessert...
Mila Kunis...I LOVE this dress!
(Photo: US Weekly)
Amy Adams...not feeling her jewelry with this dress but I like the dress
and I love Amy Adams
(Photo: US Weekly)
Always a knockout!
(Photo: US Weekly)
Meanwhile on the East Coast, I was inhaling jambalaya, cajun shrimp, sauteed tofu, bourbon chicken and pasta salad at a Mardi Gras dinner. Nothing like food, fam, friends and laughter!
This was dessert...
Raspberry Creme cake
And speaking of Mardi Gras, the Carnival festivities in Trinidad have begun! I am not going to be there but I asked my friends to keep me posted so I could live vicariously through them. Below is a pic a friend sent me from a previous Carnival...
WOW!
Saturday, February 26, 2011
It's all about staying the course.
A friend sent me this clip of Chaka Khan playing the drums. I didn't know Chaka played drums! But what struck me most about this interview was the fact that the young Chaka admitted to moments in her life when she thought it (music/business) very hard and perhaps she should stop pursuing it.
35 years later Chaka is a living legend!
As a singer/songwriter on my own journey in this music business, I find comfort in those words. It DOES take a LOT of work! Add to that all the pieces of life and you begin to understand why some people look at you like 0_0 (blank stare) when you say you're pursuing a music career! (Right now there's laundry to be done and this house needs to be cleaned but I gave the housekeeper (me) the night off!)
"...to withhold is to perish" ~ Kahlil Gibran. I do this (music and writing) because there is a voice within me fighting to be heard. If I don't sing, if I don't write, I feel like I'll just burst!
If I don't express myself and allow my voice to be heard, that voice inside me will die.
35 years later Chaka is a living legend!
As a singer/songwriter on my own journey in this music business, I find comfort in those words. It DOES take a LOT of work! Add to that all the pieces of life and you begin to understand why some people look at you like 0_0 (blank stare) when you say you're pursuing a music career! (Right now there's laundry to be done and this house needs to be cleaned but I gave the housekeeper (me) the night off!)
"...to withhold is to perish" ~ Kahlil Gibran. I do this (music and writing) because there is a voice within me fighting to be heard. If I don't sing, if I don't write, I feel like I'll just burst!
If I don't express myself and allow my voice to be heard, that voice inside me will die.
Friday, February 25, 2011
How do you keep the music playing?
As I looked into the works of the great songwriters Alan and Marilyn Bergman, I came across quite a few of my favorite songs, which I had no idea they wrote!
One of my absolute faves is "How Do You Keep The Music Playing?"
The song has been covered many times, (which I also just discovered) but most of us probably remember the classic version by James Ingram and Ms Patti Austin (yes, I thought that was the ONLY version).
While googling performances of this song, I found a beautiful rendition by James himself, with Tamia. I love her! She has such a pure pretty voice!
I fell in love with her voice when I heard "You Put a Move on My Heart". She put her stamp on this song!
One of my absolute faves is "How Do You Keep The Music Playing?"
The song has been covered many times, (which I also just discovered) but most of us probably remember the classic version by James Ingram and Ms Patti Austin (yes, I thought that was the ONLY version).
While googling performances of this song, I found a beautiful rendition by James himself, with Tamia. I love her! She has such a pure pretty voice!
I fell in love with her voice when I heard "You Put a Move on My Heart". She put her stamp on this song!
Adele 21
My friend Michelle (whom I tease and call my personal "Billboard") raved about "Chasing Pavements" before I'd even heard it and when she tells you to keep an eye out for an artist, do just that, because before you know it, they're the next big thing! Adele, Bruno Mars, Janelle Monae, even Alicia Keys when everyone was "hot on Beyonce" (as Michelle says lol)...are all artists she raved about before they officially hit the map so to speak.
So I have Adele's new album and it is SOOOOOOO good ! I absolutely LOVE her voice, which seems to be stronger, more powerful now, but not overbearing at all...pleasant and raw! It's soulful...that girl sings her soul!
I have no faves yet; I love every single song so far, so I'll come back at a later date to let you know which I've really fallen in love with...if not all !
Adele
(Billboard Image)
For more on Adele and her Billboard cover story, click here. Tuesday, February 22, 2011
"Paying the Price"
I found this article in the Rich Dad Blog and it speaks directly to me. It is fairly long but well worth it...I hope it speaks to you as well:
"Paying the Price
A Roman poet once wrote, “All wish to possess knowledge, but few, comparatively speaking, are willing to pay the price.” One could easily substitute the word success for knowledge and have the same meaning applied. Whether it be knowledge or success, why does something that the vast majority of people want so rarely occur? What are the defining characteristics of those individuals who turn their wishes into actualized dreams?
A world-class pianist performed a concert, and afterward, one of the audience members came up, and praised the pianist for his talent. In the midst of praise, the audience member commented on how they wished they could play like the pianist. The pianist looked at the audience member and said, "To get to the point I am now, I have practiced on average 10 hours a day for the last twenty years. Would you be willing to do that to play like I do?" The audience member begrudgingly shook their head no, and quietly walked away.
While certain people may be blessed with more natural talent than others, each person faces a journey that will be marred with difficulties and pitfalls on their way to success. No matter how much natural talent the pianist in the story was blessed with, there were undoubtedly time periods where it was difficult to reach that next level of success - times where dedication and perseverance were necessary in order to make that next step of progress.
Stage One: Desire
If success were a magical gift that could be bestowed on anyone that asked for it, how many would turn it down? Naturally, success means different things to different people, as not all individuals define success in monetary terms. The arts and many professions and hobbies that individuals engage in provide little in terms of monetary rewards, yet for every individual who reaches the pinnacle in their respective area, there are thousands who lag behind. If you ask any of these thousands if they wished to be as successful or as talented as the people at the top of their area of interest, you undoubtedly would have a collective yes to the question.
It is the rare individual who desires nothing. A lack of desire for wealth, knowledge, notoriety, peace, or talent is foreign to the human condition. In fact, desire is so innately part of the human experience that we should have pity on those that have little to no desire for anything as they are scarcely human.
If you look inwardly, you likely will find desires in numerous areas. It would not be unusual if you wish to be knowledgeable, financially successful, respected, and skillful in those work and hobby areas you engage in. Desire is not the hard part. You join billions of other people who have the same basics desires you have. The question is, how do you separate yourself from the billion-member pack?
Stage Two: Dedication
While we all may be part of the multi-billion member pack who have desires, there are individuals who want to achieve that which they desire more than others. We oftentimes label these individuals over-achievers, type A personalities, or workaholics, but whatever the label, they usually share a common characteristic - they work harder at achieving their goals than others. They pay the price that the Roman poet referred to, in order to achieve the goal that they set out to do.
This hard work manifests itself for long time periods as well. It is far too common for passion to manifest itself in an individual, and for them to work hard for short periods to achieve the desire. They may want to learn to play the guitar, so they buy one, and practice intensely for a few days, weeks, or months. Then one day, the motivation isn't there, and they stop. Pawn shops across the world are filled with the temporary desires that lacked the dedication to see it through.
Becoming proficient at something can be difficult. Becoming really good at something is not easy to achieve without time and energy put into that endeavor. While certain things are easy to maintain once the skill is learned (riding a bike comes to mind), most things require dedication, time, and constant energy in order for success to be achieved. If it came easy to everyone, then we wouldn't put any value on it, would we?
Stage Three: Perseverance
Perhaps the rarest of individuals is the individual who has desires, manifests dedication, and overcomes all obstacles that are thrown their way. One definition of perseverance is, "To persist steadfastly in pursuit of an undertaking, task, journey, or mission, in spite of distraction, difficulty, obstacles, or discouragement" (en.wiktionary.org/wiki/persevere). I like the person I might become if this definition of perseverance could be applied to me.
Distraction comes in many forms, often in the forms of pleasures that are easier, and offer comfort today. Difficulty will manifest itself in many forms, from skills that you may be currently underdeveloped to life problems that present themselves in many forms. Discouragement is far too common, as those that have sold short in life are often envious of even the attempt of success. Tell someone your desires, dreams, goals, and you likely will get looks and comments of disbelief and commentary on how that isn't possible. Too often it is those that are closest to us who offer the discouraging words. We all have shortcomings and have failed, and those close to us know these characteristics and instances well.
There is no reason you can't become the person you want to be. There are a million reasons you and others can give on why it isn't possible. There is a price to pay to achieve the success we want in life. It will require your time and energy, and you will have to develop the perseverance. If you can become this individual, you will belong to a rare class, accomplishing things others will admire and become someone you can be proud of. If this is in a financial area, great. If it is in another area, just as wonderful. Whatever it is, go out and pay the price necessary to accomplish your goals. "
"Paying the Price
A Roman poet once wrote, “All wish to possess knowledge, but few, comparatively speaking, are willing to pay the price.” One could easily substitute the word success for knowledge and have the same meaning applied. Whether it be knowledge or success, why does something that the vast majority of people want so rarely occur? What are the defining characteristics of those individuals who turn their wishes into actualized dreams?
A world-class pianist performed a concert, and afterward, one of the audience members came up, and praised the pianist for his talent. In the midst of praise, the audience member commented on how they wished they could play like the pianist. The pianist looked at the audience member and said, "To get to the point I am now, I have practiced on average 10 hours a day for the last twenty years. Would you be willing to do that to play like I do?" The audience member begrudgingly shook their head no, and quietly walked away.
While certain people may be blessed with more natural talent than others, each person faces a journey that will be marred with difficulties and pitfalls on their way to success. No matter how much natural talent the pianist in the story was blessed with, there were undoubtedly time periods where it was difficult to reach that next level of success - times where dedication and perseverance were necessary in order to make that next step of progress.
Stage One: Desire
If success were a magical gift that could be bestowed on anyone that asked for it, how many would turn it down? Naturally, success means different things to different people, as not all individuals define success in monetary terms. The arts and many professions and hobbies that individuals engage in provide little in terms of monetary rewards, yet for every individual who reaches the pinnacle in their respective area, there are thousands who lag behind. If you ask any of these thousands if they wished to be as successful or as talented as the people at the top of their area of interest, you undoubtedly would have a collective yes to the question.
It is the rare individual who desires nothing. A lack of desire for wealth, knowledge, notoriety, peace, or talent is foreign to the human condition. In fact, desire is so innately part of the human experience that we should have pity on those that have little to no desire for anything as they are scarcely human.
If you look inwardly, you likely will find desires in numerous areas. It would not be unusual if you wish to be knowledgeable, financially successful, respected, and skillful in those work and hobby areas you engage in. Desire is not the hard part. You join billions of other people who have the same basics desires you have. The question is, how do you separate yourself from the billion-member pack?
Stage Two: Dedication
While we all may be part of the multi-billion member pack who have desires, there are individuals who want to achieve that which they desire more than others. We oftentimes label these individuals over-achievers, type A personalities, or workaholics, but whatever the label, they usually share a common characteristic - they work harder at achieving their goals than others. They pay the price that the Roman poet referred to, in order to achieve the goal that they set out to do.
This hard work manifests itself for long time periods as well. It is far too common for passion to manifest itself in an individual, and for them to work hard for short periods to achieve the desire. They may want to learn to play the guitar, so they buy one, and practice intensely for a few days, weeks, or months. Then one day, the motivation isn't there, and they stop. Pawn shops across the world are filled with the temporary desires that lacked the dedication to see it through.
Becoming proficient at something can be difficult. Becoming really good at something is not easy to achieve without time and energy put into that endeavor. While certain things are easy to maintain once the skill is learned (riding a bike comes to mind), most things require dedication, time, and constant energy in order for success to be achieved. If it came easy to everyone, then we wouldn't put any value on it, would we?
Stage Three: Perseverance
Perhaps the rarest of individuals is the individual who has desires, manifests dedication, and overcomes all obstacles that are thrown their way. One definition of perseverance is, "To persist steadfastly in pursuit of an undertaking, task, journey, or mission, in spite of distraction, difficulty, obstacles, or discouragement" (en.wiktionary.org/wiki/persevere). I like the person I might become if this definition of perseverance could be applied to me.
Distraction comes in many forms, often in the forms of pleasures that are easier, and offer comfort today. Difficulty will manifest itself in many forms, from skills that you may be currently underdeveloped to life problems that present themselves in many forms. Discouragement is far too common, as those that have sold short in life are often envious of even the attempt of success. Tell someone your desires, dreams, goals, and you likely will get looks and comments of disbelief and commentary on how that isn't possible. Too often it is those that are closest to us who offer the discouraging words. We all have shortcomings and have failed, and those close to us know these characteristics and instances well.
There is no reason you can't become the person you want to be. There are a million reasons you and others can give on why it isn't possible. There is a price to pay to achieve the success we want in life. It will require your time and energy, and you will have to develop the perseverance. If you can become this individual, you will belong to a rare class, accomplishing things others will admire and become someone you can be proud of. If this is in a financial area, great. If it is in another area, just as wonderful. Whatever it is, go out and pay the price necessary to accomplish your goals. "
Sunday, February 20, 2011
Anger Management?
My son said "Mom, I think you need Anger Management". At first I laughed...but as I thought about it, maybe the kid is right! When I'm mad, the heat rushes through my body in an instant, and I feel as though I'm morphing into some kinda wildebeest!!
Suppressing it is even worse because I found myself talking to myself in the car yesterday. It was one of those situations where I didn't want to say anything hurtful to someone in the heat of the moment, but it was something that needed to be addressed. So what did I do? I went to my car and as I was driving let out a long hard SCREAM!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
You know what? It felt good!! REALLY good!! Noone's feelings were hurt, (noONE for that matter) I dealt with the situation when I was able to be civil, lol, I certainly felt better, and as crazy as that might sound to you, it freed me for the rest of my day.
I was reminded of the movie, so I watched it again recently...everyone needs a little Guuuzfrahbahhh in their life...here's a couple of my fave scenes...
He even wrote a book titled "Anger Issues"
...and he's talking ish about me in the book so had to buy it!
Suppressing it is even worse because I found myself talking to myself in the car yesterday. It was one of those situations where I didn't want to say anything hurtful to someone in the heat of the moment, but it was something that needed to be addressed. So what did I do? I went to my car and as I was driving let out a long hard SCREAM!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!
You know what? It felt good!! REALLY good!! Noone's feelings were hurt, (noONE for that matter) I dealt with the situation when I was able to be civil, lol, I certainly felt better, and as crazy as that might sound to you, it freed me for the rest of my day.
"What is not ex-pressed is de-pressed" ~ Mark Nepo
I was reminded of the movie, so I watched it again recently...everyone needs a little Guuuzfrahbahhh in their life...here's a couple of my fave scenes...
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
V-DAY!
Card from my son for Valentine's
Yesterday was the Valentine's frenzy. I saw last-minute shoppers raiding the shelves for chocolates, flowers and cute little teddy bears (ahem, yes I was one of them lol)
Some people argue that this grandiose show of affection should be expressed every day of the year, not only on February 14th. Others are glad for the opportunity to receive gifts and a little boo-lovin! lol
My night met me wrapped up in my 300 count sheets (yeah 3 sheets of 100 count each) recuperating from the Grammy party.
Regardless of how you spent it, I hope you enjoyed your day!
Valentine's fact: People buy the most flowers on Mother's Day, Valentine's ranks 2nd!
For the origin of Valentine's click here
Do you have a funny Valentine story/ experience? Feel free to leave a comment and share!
At the Grammy Party NYC
Headed to the Grammy party
This year we went to Jay-Z's 40/40 club in NYC to celebrate the Grammys. It wasn't one of my fave Grammy Award shows but congrats to all the nominees and musicians in any event. Since I've been working on my musicianship and I see the other side of the business, I know it takes a lot of hard work to do what they do, so I applaud them.
Once inside the par-tay, we headed for our Grammy tattoos and drinks! Hey, gotta get the party started right!
With my cousins at the party
I'm not quite loving this look but it works on Riri*
Gaga, who's usually one of my faves, disappointed with her re-enactment of "Vogue" meets "Express Yourself", and I wasn't feeling the egg from which she hatched.
One award show she was meat, this year an egg, next year I'm guessing she'll be pancakes or a side of bacon!*
uhm...Nicki I love you...but...sideways glance*
I LUVVVVVV this dress!!!! *
My fave performances were by the man himself, Mick Jagger (I felt the energy through the screen), Eminem, Rihanna and Cee-Lo (who had me with the muppets!)
Kudos to all the winners!
We were almost eaten by a lady rushing for the sliders (mini-burgers) but overall we had a really fun night!
For 15 things you didn't see on TV and more outrageous outfits at the Grammy's here.
*images, not personal commentary, courtesy US Weekly
Sunday, February 13, 2011
Happy Birthday Charlie Brown (R.I.P.)
Charlie Brown
Today would've been my friend Charlie's birthday. I called him Charlie Brown. He was such a fun guy. Cool, friendly, crazy, funny sense of humor...just a really great person. Almost 2 years ago he passed away...almost 2 years already.
Charlie was like an older brother to me. We would talk and joke around all the time. He wasn't afraid to be himself and I admired that because for most of my life I had been a people pleaser. He once told me "Mandyville (his nickname for me) damned if you do, and damned if you don't, so just be you" and that has stuck with me ever since.
He's left behind a wonderful family and friends who miss him dearly....not to mention a ton of funny sayings and great one-liners to use! lol
Charlie with his beautiful daughter Sherayne
Charlie and fam
Here he is with my son at the West Indian Parade in East Orange, NJ
Yes that's paint on them...smh...lol
Charlie Brown we luv and miss you ...R.I.P.
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