Wednesday, March 2, 2011

Something as simple as this...

A few days ago I was heading out to dinner, and as I was getting dressed I picked up one of my favorite pairs of earrings and realized the hook was broken. A little bit of sadness washed over me, not only because it was a fave pair, but also because so many memories came back to me at that moment.
I don't even think I bought them, if I remember correctly my best friend had given them to me. I LOVE chandelier earrings, and she knows my style and taste. Anyway I've used them for YEARS! If you think YBF ripped on Meagan Good for repeatedly wearing her "door-knocker" earrings, then they REALLY would've had a field day with me! lol

Meagan Good (on right of course) and her infamous earrings
Pic from stylebistro

But I LOVED my earrings! I was madly in love at the time (literally!..the stories I could tell hahaha) and I remember the excitement of dressing up and going out with him...and those earrings. I remember all the dinners, parties, outfits, moments that we shared...I remember the heartbreak when we were fading...and still wearing and loving those earrings.
One New Year's Day, I was all dolled up and looked absolutely gorgeous, (you know when you look and feel stunning?) and he glazed right over me. It was as though I wasn't even there. I cried so much that night...the kinda cry when you actually feel your heart break? I looked like Courtney Love, minus the guitar!

Courtney Love...and I think this is one of her good days
I looked waaay worse than this.

I remember looking in the mirror at my tear-stained, makeup-all-over-the-place face, and taking off those earrings.
So I'm a little sad to throw them out, but I smile to myself at how far I've come. At the time I thought I'd literally die from a broken heart, and here I am stronger than before. It's a much different time in my life. I'm happy again, but my joy comes from within now. Everything else is a bonus! I love passionately because it's who I am, but this time not at the expense of my self-worth.

"I was destined to repeat the pain of rejection,
no matter how skillfully I handled it,
until I opened the door of self-worth"
~ Mark Nepo


Anonymous said...


Mandy Bennett said...

Thanks...that's exactly how I feel ! lol